住在我身体里的那个家伙

1915年某(🐊)天，河北(🔜)易县清(🌥)西(🥨)陵，锣鼓(🏆)喧天，鼓(🤲)乐齐(qí )鸣。浩(hào )浩荡荡(dàng )的(de )队伍(wǔ )带(dài )着(🤵)珍妃(fē(🤥)i )的遗体(⬛)来(🔛)此，并将(🕎)其安葬(🦂)在这里，珍妃(fēi )的贴身(shē(🥉)n )太监福(fú )海(hǎi )（(📳)顽(wán )风(🧓)(fēng ) 饰）(🗓)忠(zhōng )心耿(🍜)耿，留下(📀)来守候主子的陵寝。时间(🎰)飞逝，23年后大(dà )清(🥓)(qīng )国早(🎎)(zǎo )已(yǐ(✖) )灭亡，中华(🧔)大地进(🌩)入动荡纷争的时期，内忧外患，民(mín )不聊生(🍐)(shēng )，百姓(👇)(xìng )流(liú(🍦) )离失(shī(👕) )所(🚄)(suǒ )，穷则(♊)思变。某个酒馆，食客谈起前朝往事，称慈禧(xǐ )太后(🗳)（朱(zhū(🌘) )琳 饰(shì(🏩) )）(🗨)害死珍(📑)(zhēn )妃（(🖇)黎静 饰），后因内心恐慌(🦓)而舍出无数金银(🚀)(yín )财宝(🧞)将(jiāng )其(🥪)(qí )厚葬(zà(😁)ng )。正是言(😒)(yán )者无心，听者有意。关于(👬)财宝的传说令数(📝)路人(ré(📆)n )马动了(👙)(le )心思。 《光猪(💞)六(liù )壮(🚝)士》的制作人乌贝托·帕索里尼，颇让人惊(🎂)(jīng )喜地(🕔)带(dài )来(🍷)他的(de )导(🐇)(dǎ(🕥)o )演处(chù(🌟) )女(nǚ )作——喜剧《狩猎台》，一个关于斯里兰卡人(ré(➖)n )移民的(🥖)(de )闹剧。旅(🎩)(lǚ(🈂) )馆酒(jiǔ(🏯) )保(bǎo )马(🛸)诺（这一角色本来意属(📛)编剧的兄弟来扮(🤯)演），他(😝)的(de )倒霉(🍵)朋(🥗)(péng )友(yǒ(🌑)u )，永(yǒng )远(😸)(yuǎn )处于破(pò )产状态下的(🚘)水果小贩史丹利(🚦)，还有其(🌺)他生活(🤑)在(zài )科伦(💸)坡(pō )平(👸)民窟(kū )的(de )人们（大多数由非专业人员扮(🛀)演）。在(🔒)他们的(🛳)德国签(🍰)(qiā(👼)n )证的申(📺)(shēn )请被拒(jù )绝(jué )之后(hòu )，马诺和史丹利却意外地(🚐)发现一(🏇)张皱巴(🈺)巴(🔴)的参加(🐫)(jiā )巴伐(❄)利(lì )亚手球(qiú )赛(sài )的邀(🌟)(yāo )请(qǐng )函。于(yú )是(🉐)，一场移(🙄)民闹剧(🈂)上(🛁)演了。 此(💨)片不同(🤴)于以往的(de ) Hammer 吸血鬼(guǐ )的(de )故(🤛)事(shì )模(mó )式，描(miá(🍃)o )写由吸(📮)血鬼化(⛩)身而成的(🍴)巡迴马(🔅)戏团来到一个已(yǐ )经遭受(shòu )诅咒与(yǔ )疫(🎴)(yì )情的(🤬)村(cūn )落(🥠)，并且带(👴)来(🆖)灾难的(🙆)故事。此部片的故事背景(jǐng )设定在(zài )19世纪的(de )塞(sā(🐽)i )尔维(wé(🚥)i )亚(yà )，这(🧚)些(🍑)(xiē )如吉(🌪)普赛人(🅾)般的马戏团成员事实上(🕢)都是(shì )会变身(shē(✏)n )的吸血(🛠)(xuè )鬼(guǐ(🤚) )。 It's the old dark house plot again with added gore. Foolish young people take shelter in in old house or in this case, hotel and all hell then breaks loose. Not one of the most original stories in the field of horror films and sadly there is nothing really new in this made for TV movie. Other than the only known case of death by washing machine that is! Made in 1989 but looks even more dated than that, the jocks and bimbos in the American splatter films were pretty air-headed but they were always far worse and incredibly stupid in the European ones. Anyone with an ounce of sense would see what a 'con-damned' building this house was and run for the hills. These just wait around aimlessly to be picked off by the forces of evil. The sound dubbing isn't very good either and somewhat annoying as none of the voices seem to be in tune with the actors. And the small child while I guess, is supposed to be cute is just a major pain in the backside. But then again, none of the cast are sympathetic and you don't really care what happens to them. Thus it rattles onto a dull finale and disappointment. Like a lot of Spanish and Italian films in this genre, the horror effects happen for no rhyme or reason, just to try to elicit a scare. There has to be some bounds of credibility and logic in even the most dopey plots. When Edgar sees his girlfriend Betty getting up close and personal with his best friend Carl, he murders Carl in a jealous rage and hides the corpse under the floor of his piano room. Comes the night, and Edgar begins to hear strange sounds coming from under the floor... Written by Peter W. Many, Jr. 一(🗼)(yī )医(yī(🌦) )生成命(🍟)(mìng )案疑犯，他潜逃到澳门(👟)，隐姓埋名，当了黑(🍳)市(shì )医(🍚)生，遇(yù(😄) )上一(yī )神(🏖)(shén )秘婆(🌾)婆(pó )、可怜少女、自称为转世灵童的藏(🏿)人和黑(👿)道大(dà(👐) )哥。婆(pó(😐) )婆(🦓)为他(tā(❤) )解(jiě )开昔日(rì )命案疑团，原来她竟是其前女友…(🤔)… JOHN自命(🐙)风流(liú(🦓) )，样(😗)子(zǐ )平(🙀)凡的(de )小(📃)(xiǎo )明对(duì )他(tā )一往情(qí(😖)ng )深，却得不到JOHN欢心(🥑)；JOHN的哥(🤫)哥GEORGE，为人(🤦)忠(🥊)直(zhí )，与(🥋)女(nǚ )友(🎺)同居(jū )数(shù )载，极(jí )渴望(🔗)为(wéi )人父，但女友(🥧)坚决拒(🛣)绝生育(😲)，遂准备借(📫)腹生子(👲)(zǐ )，但仍(réng )需(xū )等待(dài )机(jī )会；丽(lì )姨替(📭)JOHN的电讯(👊)公司录(👖)成人电(😟)话(⛽)，却因此(⏰)与富家财(cái )展开一(yī )段电话(huà )情(qíng )缘……